Unless you decide to move in with someone you already know, moving in with your college roommate can really be a hit or miss. And sometimes it’s a really huge miss. Living with these roommates is nothing short of a nightmare.
The Coke Fiend
My roommate has an issue with finishing the last sip or two of her coke. But she also doesn’t have the heart to throw it away and waste it. So her solution is to just keep buying bottles and fill up our mini-fridge (which we share) with mostly empty ones. It’s ridiculous.
The Secret Stabber
This is literally how my roommate puts away the dishes. I mean, I’m not one to complain because at least he washes them. But the first time I went to grab for a plate on the drying rack, I literally almost sliced my wrist open. It’s dangerous!
The Cereal Killer
I swear I have never seen someone do this until I moved into the dorms with my college roommate. Instead of closing the bag inside of the cereal box, this psychopath actually folds the entire box, with the strength of the Hulk, all the way down. It doesn’t even keep everything from going stale. He says that’s what his family always did.
The Toilet Paper Piercer
If this doesn’t scream passive-aggressive, I don’t know what does. I once made a comment about how my roommate put the new toilet paper roll on backward, and it’s weird for me. He really took it to heart apparently.
I hate when I come home from a long day at school and there are dishes piled to the ceiling from my roommate who literally never does them. I keep asking her to clean them because I want to come home to an empty. freaking. sink…This is not what I meant.
The Accidental Arsonist
Apparently, my roommate’s favorite thing to do is get really drunk, come home in the middle of the night, pop a frozen pizza in the oven, and then completely forget about it and almost burn the whole apartment down. At least I got to shame him this time.
The Evil Villain
This is the moment I understood that my roommate is basically pure evil. Not much else to say except that I am keeping my own toilet paper under my bed and bringing it back and forth with me to the bathroom from now on.
The Hairy Messenger
I live in an apartment with 4 girls, all of whom have very long and thick hair. So it’s really important to clean out the drain every time you shower, so it doesn’t get clogged. Not everyone was following directions, so I gave them a reminder.
The Pizza Prankster
I was coming home late after class one night and I was starving. I called my roommates to see if they wanted to get a head start on food so it could be there when I got home. They told me they had already ordered pizza and had saved me a slice. I guess they weren’t lying…
The Bed Book
My roommate is a clean freak. I don’t really mind it because I like to have things neat as well, but sometimes I just don’t feel like making my bed and I really don’t think it’s any of her business. She feels differently.
The Snack Stealer
When I first moved in with my roommates I was all for sharing the food we’d buy. The problem is that I’m always the only one who buys food, and they get to it before I can even have any. This is my only line of defense.
The Dish Hypocrite
My roommate literally NEVER does the dishes, I have to tell him almost every single day. I usually wash mine as I’m preparing food, so I don’t have a huge mess to clean up later. ONE TIME I forgot to finish my dishes and had to run to class. I came home to this. Are you kidding me??
The Green Thumb
Apparently my roommate has a green thumb, but not the kind that grows flowers and vegetables. Rather, the kind that doesn’t wash her dishes for a week and allows mold and other unmentionables to grow on them without caring about it.
The Stingy Trash Tracker
My roommate is literally from hell. She bought a trash can for the kitchen but said that only she could use it and that we’d have to get our own. I thought she was joking, so I would use the trash can. One day she caught me, told me off about it, and the next day I saw this.
The Pee Chiller
My roommate had some issues with her kidneys and she needed to do a 24-hour pee test. Once she collected her pee, she had to keep it chilled in the fridge. It’s kind of gross, but at least she kept it pretty out of sight.
My roommate decided to take a more artistic approach to letting us know that the milk needed to be thrown away. As pretentious as he might be, I have to admire his creativity.
The Serum Stealer
My roommate does not like to share anything she has. She made this very clear during the first week of moving in, when she labeled everything she owned with her name and left notes in all drawers that were hers. Here’s one of them.
The Check Marker
So my apartment has been having an issue with remembering to flush the toilet after using it, and honestly, it’s absolutely disgusting. So I came up with a system to hold everyone accountable. Sad that I have to do it this way, but it looks like it’s working.
The Can Dater
My roommate keeps opening up cans of food and then leaving them there for literally months. I asked him to please write the dates on the cans so we can tell how long they’ve been open. At least he tried..